lizardek's obiter dictum lizardek Home Now Then Friends Info Ek Family
zird is the word [userpic]
Remember this?

At least that one washed off eventually...

She's been talking about it for a long time. I am not sure why she has been so set on getting a tattoo, but she was determined that it be something that had meaning for her and when she finally came up with the idea for 4 acorns and oak leaves (Oak = Ek, get it?) she was convinced it would be perfect. She even asked me if I would design it for her, but I demurred. Not because I didn't want to design a cool tattoo but because I kinda didn't want my perfect daughter to do something so irreversible, at least not without thinking about it for awhile longer. Like maybe YEARS awhile longer, haha! BUT I am fine with it, I think it was done very well (even if I could wish it was a smidge smaller) and I applaud the sentiment. Four acorns for the four of us in the Ek family. :) Anyway, now it's done and there's no use crying over spilled ink. And she's happy as all get out about it, so there's that. She didn't even have to pay for it, since 4 of her friends gave it to her for her 18th birthday.

PS. That big bruise above it is from soccer, not the tattooing.
mood: resigned
music: Katrina & the Waves—Walking on Sunshine

zird is the word [userpic]
Headache day. I've had headaches almost every day this week, waking with them early enough to sometimes medicate and fall back asleep but not always. Today's was a doozy and I ended up staying home and seriously (!) being a slug. I slept on and off most of the day, reading a bit in between and keeping an eye on work emails, since I have a lot to do and was stressing a bit about not being in the office. I don't know if the changes in temperature and weather are responsible, but UGH. Would like to have my head back.

This week marks the definite change to autumn. I saw the first sugar beet on the side of the road, heralding the official start of fall in Skåne. Some of the leaves are turning, but down here we mostly have the browns and golds, and not the blazing reds and oranges I wish we had. When you DO see the red autumn leaves they are almost a shock: so bright and fancy against the still green or drab landscapes. Even the hay bales have mostly been gathered in and the fields are barren and ready for winter rest. Tomorrow is the equinox, and I find myself boggling almost daily at how late in the year it already is.

For some reason, I was making a mental list earlier today of all the physical things that are wrong with me right now. Some of them can be chalked up to aging and some are things that I'm doing something about, but UGH. It feels sometimes like a never-ending list. Just when I start working on one problem, something else falls apart or goes to hell. If this is what getting older is all about, I wanna get off. Start over. Go back to a time when I could really appreciate how nicely everything just WORKS like it's supposed to.

It's such a busy time of year and yet I feel I am sort of sitting things out and letting time pass. Maybe I'm feeling the pain of separation more than I'd like to admit. Learning to live without your children, after nearly 20 years of their daily presence, is tough. I don't know if Karin is making it harder or easier by never being home, haha! I text with Martin often, and we call him every weekend, but it's not the same, and sometimes it makes me miss him more. He seems to be settling in well and is enjoying his classes and the work, and making friends. I just wish he wasn't so darn FAR away. Hi, mom! :D (fruit, fall, not far from the tree, I KNOW)

I wonder if it's partly the time of year...heading into winter, holidays, hibernation, that is making me feel all the feels so much more. We tend to introspection this time of year, I suppose. In the spring and summer we're too busy enjoying the outdoors and all the bright shining newness of things to get moody. For me, anyway, writing it out here definitely helps. And, of course, knowing (or at least hoping) that someone is reading, listening, and possibly nodding their head.
mood: contemplative
music: Haim—Nothing's Wrong

zird is the word [userpic]
Just so you can see the difference.

Turned off the alarm at 6:45 am
Sprunched Barky
Checked emails and Instagram
Made and packed lunch
Drove to work
Fetched breakfast upstairs and ate it standing at my desk
Sent 25 work emails in response to questions
Closed 30 job tickets
Designed and delivered 2 web banners
Updated and delivered 4 print advertisements
Reviewed 5 business cards
Updated and delivered another business card
Designed 2 flyers
Had lunch with my daughter
Went for a 20-minute walk in the sunshine
Designed and delivered nametags for 2 different internal events
Updated design of 3 maps for a partner event
Had afternoon fika with a friend/colleague
Danced for 3 minutes with my team for our afternoon dance/plank pause
Updated another flyer
Reviewed and approved 4 HTML blasts
Released quarterly partner enews
Released 6 HTML blasts for various regions
Updated mailing lists and databases with new regional marketing staff
Drove home
Read several chapters of my book
Answered emails, checked Facebook and Instagram, uploaded a photo
Called and activated 2 new members for the AWC
Made and ate dinner
Wrote this silly post
Watched an episode of Outlander

And now it's after 9 pm! I am going to go read some more, and maybe call my mom before bedtime since I didn't manage to call her yesterday. :)

My week/work days are always busier, of course, than the weekends, but this past weekend WAS really sluggy, really it was! haha!
mood: busy
music: Paula Abdul—Straight Up

zird is the word [userpic]
Today was meant to be a slug day, too, but I woke up super early in pain (AGAIN), same as last weekend, and couldn't get comfortable or back to sleep for several hours. I've already been this past week to the doctor and gotten a time booked for an ultrasound (in 2 weeks) to have my gallbladder checked, since it happened last weekend and my brother yelled at me, but now I'm just hoping I don't have an acute episode beforehand. URGH.

So, when I finally DID get up, I showered and dressed, and then, thumbing my nose at both Megsie and Ozswede, I cleaned the toilets, the sinks and Windexed all the glass & mirrors in the house. THEN I basically did nothing the rest of the day. Unless you count going to watch Karin's soccer game IN THE RAIN. But then I took a nap. So... slug...ish.

Anyway. I got the confirmation results letter from the allergy clinic and it was addressed to "Bästa ELIZABETH SLAUGHTER EK!" which made me laugh. Very enthusiastic greeting, allergy nurse! I think all healthcare correspondence should start with your name in all caps, the fact that you are BEST and an exclamation point. It confirmed that I am allergic to birch (like crazy) but NOT allergic to cats or dogs. Which, wait, what? Does that mean I can get a cat? (barring my allergic husband, I mean) Or will I just redevelop cat-allergies if I do?

I'm continuing on the board of the AWC again for next year, because I'm ridiculous. But I figure if I DON'T, then there will be pretty much no reasons left to ever leave the house (apart from work, of course). I need to up my social game. With Martin gone and Karin basically treating home as a hotel/restaurant when she deigns to spend a few hours here, I seem to be having more alone time than is really healthy for me. Maybe I should sign Anders and I up for a course or something.

The AWC board elections are in a week but we already have a full slate of excellent nominees for the board, for which I'm really grateful. We even found an enthusiastic person to take over the Treasurer position, which had us all worried for awhile. We've had a slew of new members this past month and about a dozen people who have rejoined in response to my membership drive email to people who were deactivated by the former membership officer a year and a half ago.

Choir did start 2 Thursdays ago, but the jury is still out on the new choir leader. She's enthusiastic, but quite young and inexperienced. I don't know if she's up to dealing with the demands of this one, and we've had lots of people drop out, which is a bummer, though not totally unexpected. And while we DO have some new people, we have yet to mesh in any meaningful way. We'll see. I'll give it some time, but I'm already thinking that if it doesn't make me as happy going as it did a year and a half ago, then it's better to try to find another choir that DOES. I do not want to spend time doing things that don't bring me joy, and while singing DOES, normally, there are other factors playing against it here. URGH.

I went to watch Karin's soccer game this afternoon. Karin had asked me and I said maybe, if it wasn't raining. It was a lovely day all day UNTIL right before the game was supposed to start, then the skies went dark, opened up and let loose. Thunder, too! I waited a little bit but it didn't see to want to quit, so finally I thought, oh what the hell, and I went anyway. I had just waterproofed my raincoat, after all.

Good thing, too, since it poured ceaselessly throughout the game, even though the sun came out in the last half, too. Crazy fall weather. They lost 4-0 but played the second half pretty well, considering they were up against one of the best teams (Karin's former teammates from Sandby) in the series. I haven't been to watch Karin play in ages, (insert bad mom slap here), so it was nice to see her in action.

I need another weekend, I think.
mood: lethargic
music: Anders talking to his mom on the phone

zird is the word [userpic]
I have been badly in need of a slug day and today was it.

Slept in, read, played games, sat on the porch and enjoyed the sunshine and warm temps, read some more, answered emails, started a new book, watched a terrible 70s movie after finding out it existed, based on the book I had started, ate leftovers for dinner

(did 3 loads of laundry, scrubbed the bathtub, vacuumed the house)

Can I do it all over again tomorrow?


(although I've all but promised Karin I'll go watch her soccer game in the long as it isn't raining)
mood: lazy
music: None. Too sluggish to turn on Spotify

zird is the word [userpic]
It seems as though lately it's always about to rain, raining, or wet from having just rained. It falls in sheets, in a steady frizzling drizzle, in bursts with the leaves turned sideways and inside-out, showing off their silver undersides. The ground is dark with water, rivulets run from every rooftop edge and corner. If waterdrops were diamonds, I'd be a rich woman...they're hanging from every leaf and faded summer bloom.

And yet, it's a gentle (if annoying) constant patter of water against our lives. Nothing like the thundering gales that are battering other parts of the world. We have no flooding, no gale force winds, no empty grocery stores where water is scarce in bottles, though abundant in places it usually isn't.

The other night, I answered the phone to find someone on the other end taking a (I assume) public service survey. He wasn't Swedish, and consequently I had a hard time understanding him, though he spoke Swedish perfectly well. Without lips to read, I struggled to grasp the entirety of each sentence and had to ask him to repeat himself several times. His questions had to do with my knowledge of the Swedish government's state of readiness for an emergency...did I know there was such a policy? If not, did I know where to find out about it?

What do you mean? I asked. Like if the infrastructure of society shut down in the wake of a long would I, and my family, be able to manage? Without electricity, without power, without water, without food. I have no idea, I answered. Did I know what the Swedish government's recommendations for survival were in the event of a national emergency? No, I said. A week? A month?

What I really wanted to ask was, why? Are they expecting one? A disaster so enormous that my family and I would need to be able to survive for an unspecified length of time. Like a hurricane in Texas? In the Caribbean? In Florida?

I suppose if we lived in a place where such occurrences were a fairly frequent reality, I would be better equipped, or at least more knowledgeable, in how to deal with them. Maybe I'd be more of a gardener, prepared with my own vegetable patch. Maybe we'd have a well for fresh water. Maybe we'd have a storage room stacked with rolls of toilet paper and bottled water. I don't think I'd want to live in a place where I had to be worried at least once a year that my home and belongings and life might be irreparably destroyed by a natural disaster that I knew in advance was a consequence of living there.

Even though I lived in the Midwest for a great part of my early life, where tornadoes are something you just live with, it was always something that happened to someone else. Is that how people who live in the path of hurricanes feel? Even though, year after year, they are proven wrong? It doesn't just happen to someone else, in far-off Bangladesh or St. Thomas or Cuba, wherever. It happens to them.

I have friends and family in Florida and all along the east coast of the US. Every year, I worry about them in the wake of that year's slew of storms and hurricanes. Just because I made the (oblivious) decision to live in mostly-natural-disaster-free Sweden, it doesn't excuse me from worrying and empathizing with the rest of the world when disaster strikes elsewhere. And, I mean, realistically speaking, how long WOULD I and my family survive without the infrastructure of society holding us up? Probably not very long. My husband is super-handy but even he can't make food out of nothing and growing our own would take preparation and time we probably wouldn't have. And I'm a graphic designer, for crying out loud. Not exactly survivalist material. I'd be Darwin-awarded in a minimal amount of time, I'm sure.

It's supposed to be partly sunny tomorrow. I sure hope so. A little ray of warmth and brightness could really help lighten the mood!
mood: calm
music: September—Cry For You

zird is the word [userpic]
In my seemingly neverendingly-growing list of things that I need to fix about myself, today I went to see an allergy specialist in Eslöv. I have been to many, many allergy doctors in my life, but it's been years and I figured it was time to get a handle on my worsening symptoms and see if there were new possibilities that might help. I spend so much time sneezing and blowing my nose and having itchy, running eyes, etc.—finally figured enough was enough.

I already know what I'm allergic to, but the nurses sat me right down and did a "prick test" where they drop tiny drops of allergens in a grid on your arm and then prick them into your skin. Sure enough, a huge blister hive for birch developed almost immediately, and the "histamine" control on the other end was nearly as big. Miniscule reactions for horse, dog, cat and grass, but nothing for dustmites, "gråbo" (a kind of ragweed-type plant) or mold. They also did a blood test but I won't have the results of that back for 2 weeks.

I filled out a 4-page form about my allergy symptoms and history, and then got called in to talk to the doctor. We talked about options and I got information on the hyper-sensitization procedure that I've heard so much about the past few years, but the doctor told me that it appeared to her as if my actual allergies are minimal and the problems that I have year round with my sinuses and symptoms are actually related to something else going on with my nose and its surrounding blood vessels. I told her about the horrible procedure that I had done a few years back that involved giant needles and cauterizing, and that it helped absolutely not at all, and she sympathized. But, she said, even if I go ahead with the hyper-sensitization, there is no guarantee it will help with the problem...though it will probably minimize the symptoms I have during the spring that are actually caused by my birch allergy.

I have to decide soon, before the end of October, since the procedure has to be started well before the spring pollen season. It involves a major commitment for an entire year: a shot a week, during work hours (either 9 am or 3 pm), plus a half-hour wait after each one in case of a bad reaction, for six months, and then a shot a month for another six months. URGH.

She prescribed some different meds for my nose/sinuses: tablets, nose spray and eye drops. I guess I either have to pay for medicine the rest of my life or kleenex. One of my friends suggested I try a homeopath and see what other alternatives might be available that way, but I'm not even sure where to begin.

Choir starts tomorrow! A new choir leader is starting too, so it will be interesting to see how things change. And Friday, we are going to see the new Cirque du Soleil show, Varekai, at Malmö Arena. Yay! I'm excited, it seems ages since we went to see any kind of show. Maybe not the best time financially to spend the money, but it's worth it, for sure.
mood: blank

zird is the word [userpic]
Pursuing: tickets to next week's Cirque du Soleil perfomance in Malmö

Targeting: my disinclination to get out and walk

Devouring: Sleeping Giants by Sylvain Neuvel

Perceiving: faint calls from the cockatoo next door

Dithering: whether to continue paying HBO Nordic after the first free month

Continuing: never-ending laundry, even with one kid gone

Consuming: Anders' homemade Cheddar & Chantarelle quiche

Recovering: from the annual crayfish party last, but SO tired today!

Luxuriating: blue skies, warm temperatures, sunshine, puffy white clouds...last gasp Swedish summer? I'll take it!

Distracting: Two Dots, Instagram, iPad Cribbage

Resigning: myself to 18 months in open landscape at work. UGH

Anticipating: Dinner tonight with my two best friends in Sweden!
mood: contemplative
music: tumble dryer noises

zird is the word [userpic]
We knew what we were getting into, honestly, we did. Allowing our 18-year-old social butterfly daughter to invite 94 people to party at our house in celebration of her birthday. By the RSVP date, the tally stood at 71 people and was up to 74 a couple of days before. Anders and I have, of course, met many of the kids at some point, though not all of them, by any means.

There were teammates from the 3 different soccer teams that Karin has played on. Classmates and school friends from junior high and high school. Theater kids from the Pex group that Karin participated in last year (and is in again this year as both mentor, scriptwriter and actor). Co-workers from her last job, even.

Everyone dressed up, including Karin. She was a ninja pirate :) There were kids dressed as royalty, in suits, in wetsuits, in pizza deliveryman shirts. Everyone got into the swing of the theme.

But there's definitely a difference when it's a party. A real party, with all that entails. Because many of the guests were not yet 18, we didn't serve much in the way of drinks, but it didn't matter since the vast majority of the guests brought their own. And because the party didn't start until 8, we didn't feel obligated to serve dinner. So we provided chips, popcorn and candy from the party's start, and at about 10 p.m., we served ice cream (the kind with 3 flavors) with sprinkles and caramel sauce. However, by that time the party was rocking so much that people didn't realize the ice cream had been served and very little of it got eaten. We won't run out of ice cream any time soon, let's just say. At midnight, we served hotdogs with buns, and they were scarfed down, all 70 of them, in a matter of minutes. :D

Because the theme of the evening was "kid's party", we had a bouncy castle, a mini ping-pong table, games to play and a fishpond, which is a staple at Swedish children's parties. You hang a sheet or blanket about 2/3rds of the way up across a doorway and provide a fishing pole with a clip on it instead of a hook. When the child goes fishing, they get a prize, usually candy, but we always have some sort of silly things on hand as well, like dirty socks, and in this case, condoms. They got quite a laugh.

The thing was, I didn't expect MY reaction to the actual party proceedings. I was anticipating that most of the time, all the kids would be out in the tent, talking or dancing. Or on the porch, or in the bouncy castle. And they were (at one point, I realized that they were dancing and singing, at the top of their lungs, in the tent to Neil Diamond's Sweet Caroline, which cracked me up), but it was COLD out, and kids kept coming in the house. And staying in the house. And being very loud and very drunk, in the house.

And I was really, really not OK with it. :(
It's my own fault for not really thinking about that aspect of it. I don't like parties all that much, at least not the drunken, young-person kind. I didn't like them when I WAS a young person and since I don't drink, I REALLY don't appreciate that part of it at all. Karin had made it rather clear that people needed to be responsible and behave and that there was to be no vomiting in the house or the yard, etc., and I think overall that was the case.

Part of the problem was that even though we were home, we were mostly in our bedroom for the first half of the evening. I got antsier and antsier hearing all the noise in the house and not seeing what was going on, and also realizing that I really hadn't party-proofed the house at all. URGH. So I kept popping out and making the rounds, just to keep an eye on things.

Karin and I had gone around and warned all the neighbors a few days before and we had stated that the music would be off by 12:30 or so. They all were very agreeable and told us not to worry about it. But turning the music off, or even down, turned out to be easier said than done. We had to tell Karin, more forcibly each time, several times, that time was up on the music. We had made the mistake of not specifying an end time for the party, and of course, the birthday girl herself didn't want the party to end. She got mad at me and I got mad at her. Every time we turned the music down, it got turned right back up and I finally made Anders go out at 1:30 and take away the iPad that was running Spotify. Of course, 15 minutes after that, some idiot hooked his phone up to the sound system so I ended up having to confiscate that, too. Ha.

I guess we thought that after hotdogs and the music going away, things would sort of naturally wind down, and eventually they sort of did, as people got picked up by parents, or left or biked home. But at 3 a.m. the house was STILL full and I was about at my limit. I was tired and crabby and really, really just wanted everyone to leave so I could go to bed. With no end in sight, I finally did. I changed, brushed my teeth, and went to bed.

And then I just laid there getting madder and madder. I could hear that there were still a lot of people in the house and they were all being very loud, laughing and yelling. Karin was trying to shush them with no luck, and at 3:30 I snapped. I got up again, got dressed, marched out and told a group of very loud guys that enough was enough: shut up, get out, go home!

Three of Karin's guy friends crashed at our house for the night and I got a bit of revenge on them the next morning, at least. There wasn't much party debris in the house, because both Anders and I had been cruising around cleaning up all during the course of the party*, but the floor of the house was a disaster: spilled drinks, crushed chips, candy wrappers, tracked-in dirt and grass EVERYWHERE. I woke them all up, including Karin, at 10 a.m. and made them vacuum and mop the entire house. All 182 square meters of it.

The tent is STILL up, but it's because we borrowed it from one of Anders' friends who is traveling for work for 4 weeks so there is no rush, and we still have to return the bouncy castle, which has taken all week to get folded up, thanks to continual rain and dampness. Karin got many compliments on how great the party was, how well thought out, what a great theme, so fun, and I'm glad that she and her friends had a good time, but I can honestly say, NEVER AGAIN. Her graduation party in June will be a real let-down, if she's expecting anything near the magnitude of her 18th birthday bash.

*Drunken teenagers are total PIGS.
mood: weird
music: Erin McCarthy—You're Not That Someone

zird is the word [userpic]
We survived the party, but I will write about it tomorrow. For now, books! I realized that I had not posted about the book group recommendations and winners and figured I would just write a book post first, since I have been lame and not posted anything for a couple of weeks. Time just gets away from me, you know?

I just finished reading The Mermaid's Daughter by Ann Claycomb and loved it. I immediately went and searched for more books by her but alas, that is the only one so far. Before that, I read My Life With Bob by by Pamela Paul, also excellent, and now I am finally reading Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor. Yay!

A Cup of Jo just posted this list by Italo Calvino, which I loved and have to share. How do YOU choose books?

Sections in the bookstore —
– Books You Haven’t Read
– Books You Needn’t Read
– Books Made for Purposes Other Than Reading
– Books Read Even Before You Open Them Since They Belong to the Category of Books Read Before Being Written
– Books That If You Had More Than One Life You Would Certainly Also Read But Unfortunately Your Days Are Numbered
– Books You Mean to Read But There Are Others You Must Read First
– Books Too Expensive Now and You’ll Wait ‘Til They’re Remaindered
– Books ditto When They Come Out in Paperback
– Books You Can Borrow from Somebody
– Books That Everybody’s Read So It’s As If You Had Read Them, Too
– Books You’ve Been Planning to Read for Ages
– Books You’ve Been Hunting for Years Without Success
– Books Dealing with Something You’re Working on at the Moment
– Books You Want to Own So They’ll Be Handy Just in Case
– Books You Could Put Aside Maybe to Read This Summer
– Books You Need to Go with Other Books on Your Shelves
– Books That Fill You with Sudden, Inexplicable Curiosity, Not Easily Justified
– Books Read Long Ago Which It’s Now Time to Re-read
– Books You’ve Always Pretended to Have Read and Now It’s Time to Sit Down and Really Read Them

I think I go by most of those, but I definitely subscribe to the section of Books That Are Too Expensive Now and You'll Wait 'Til They Come Out in Paperback, though these days, I can indulge must faster with my Kindle. :)

Anyway, we had the bookgroup recommendations list to vote on some time ago and we duly voted and here is the list, in case you're interested or looking for something to read!

Key: blue=recommended/voted for by me. green=voted for by me. yellow=already read. The ones with a star in front won.

1. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern
2. Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell
3. The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion
4. Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel
5. The Ministry of Utmost Happiness by Arundhati Roy
* 6. Half of a Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
7. Hidden Figures by Margot Lee Shetterly
8. Secondhand Time by Svetlana Alexievich
* 9. The Hillbilly Elegy by J.D. Vance
10. The Girl Before by J.P. Delancy
11. Eight Flavors by Sarah Lohman
12. Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi
13. Why Not Me? by Mindy Kaling
14. History of Love by Nicole Krauss
15. Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll
* 16. All the Ugly and Wonderful Things by Bryn Greenwood
17. Orphan Train by Christina Baker Kline

* 18. Giving Up the Ghost by Eric Nuzum
19. The Small Backs of Children by Lidia Yuknavitch

20. Rules of Civilty by Amor Towles
* 21. What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty
* 22. A Fall of Marigolds by Susan Meissner
23. The Spy Game by Georgian Harding
24. The Day of the Locust by Nathanael West
* 25. Not Pretty Enough: The Unlikely Triumph of Helen Gurley Brown by Gerri Hirshey
26. Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow
27. The Tower: Tales From a Lost Country by Uwe Tellkamp
28. Passing by Bella Larsen
* 29. The Golden Notebook by Doris Lessing
30. Stars Go Blue by Laura Pritchett
31. Benediction by Kent Haruf
32. A Mother's Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of the Columbine Tragedy by Sue Klebold
33. A Lady's Life in the Rocky Mountains by Isabella Bird

I was once again aggravated by the recommending of books by authors we have already read in book group, especially since one of them is by an author we JUST read. It's fine to want to read more by authors you like, but do it outside of book group if we've already read something by them! I was pleased that 2 of the books I recommended got voted in and promptly read one of them in advance (the discussion for it isn't scheduled until October...oops) as well of one of my recommendations that didn't make the cut.

It's a thundery Sunday. Karin spent the night at a friend's after going out clubbing last night and still hasn't called to be picked up. Anders is biking in a mountain bike race in Malmö. I am doing a load of laundry, finalizing the AWC newsletter in advance of our first meeting this coming Tuesday and reading. I am also restraining myself from going to the Flyinge Loppis that is going on in the village right now. I set out a TON of bags of stuff yesterday to be picked up, good riddance to most of it! The only other things on my to-do list are call my mom and Martin. Happy Sunday!
mood: cheerful
music: thunder

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lizardek's obiter photos
lizardek's obiter photos

Feeling generous? Be my guest!

I can complain because rose bushes have thorns or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.

Abraham Lincoln

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