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When I was 13, I met someone who would be one of my best friends for the rest of my life. I mean best friends in the Anne and Diana sense. Becky and I spent three years tying our hearts around each other. All of my best friends, and there are only 4 of them, and 2 of them have slid into the ether of busy lives, were made in 3-year bursts of intensity. The first 2 were caused by my father's Air Force move schedule, the 3rd by the vagaries of college life, and the last by the expat pull. When you only have a short time to get under someone's skin, you learn to burrow quickly.

With our gang of girlfriends, Becky and I drew and wrote and disco danced, laughed and acted out, read and played and sang. We were queens in our little geeky world of junior high on the fringe. We weren't popular people, but we didn't care. We knew we were something.

When Becky moved back to the States in 1979, we had to move on to a new stage in our friendship. My family moved to Germany, and the two of us sent letters back and forth across the ocean on a weekly basis. I remember one day when FIVE letters from her arrived all together in the post. Treasure! Over the years, our correspondence slowed down a bit, but we never lost the connection. We didn't see each other in person, with the exception of one quick weekend, for 11 years. By then, I was living in Chicago, working and making good money. I could afford to travel when and where I wanted, and first stop was Becky. We saw each other many times over the course of several years, during which she had children and her marriage fell apart, and I was betrayed in love and coated myself in a crackly layer of indifference that lasted until I met Anders. She was my Best Woman at my wedding. She knows my secrets and matches me perfectly when singing rounds.

Now, the physical distance between us is as great as it was when we were 16, but it only takes an email or a phone call or a card in the mail to make me realize that we still have a place under each other's skin.

The time difference is 9 hours, and I tried several times to call her last night with no luck. Finally, after the clock had reached midnight here in Sweden, the phone was picked up, and I was overjoyed to hear her voice. We haven't spoken in a long time, and she sounded exactly the same as she had when we were kids. Then, suddenly, after some confusion, I realized that it was her 13-year-old daughter who had answered, and time warped and slid.

Becky came on the line, then, and her voice snapped me fast forward into the present. They sound very much alike, she and her daughter, AND the 13-year-old in my head. So, we talked and laughed and caught up and I'm going to see her this summer and I CAN'T WAIT. Just like Martin, I'm going to be checking the calendar to see how many days are left until the party.

mood: loved
music: Turtles—So Happy Together


That sounds like a great friendship. :)
The picture is wonderful.

that is a fantastic photograph to go along with a nice story of your friend :)

Awwwwww. Great story and picture!

Friends like that are so priceless, perhaps separated in body, but never in mind!

God, woman, I love your writing! Perfect way of capturing how quickly friendship crystallizes when we're young and open...

Fantastic picture, too!

:) thank you, that was sweet!

What a great post, and great picture, too! I have a friend like that myself, and my last stop before I came to Sweden was her house. We hadn't seen each other in a while, but I knew I could never make this move without seeing her.

Beautiful. :)

A friendship like that is a precious commodity. I have a great friend that I don't get to see all that often, but when we do meet, we pick up exactly where we left off the last time. And that feels wonderful.

Love the picture - a perfect image for the narrative.

I long for a friendship like that!! When was the picture taken!

At my wedding. :) It was super late in the evening, and she, along with my sister, had gone back to the hotel to put her kids to bed (they were my ring bearer and one of my flower girls). They came back dressed comfortably in jeans and I yelled at them because I was still in my heavy hot gown, all sweaty from dancing all night. :D It was GREAT!

Great photo!

Your story makes me think of my best friend Elizabeth. We've been since we were five and even though we don't contact each other as often as we should or could nowadays, we can always pick up right where we left off.

What a great pic! It almost looks like a promotional photo for some wacky, fun sitcom. Love the contrasting outfits. :)

We had the best photographer at our wedding. He came up with the wackiest ideas and got us all going. You should see some of the photos, they're hilarious. :)

Oh, you're right! On closer inspection you arewearing a wedding dress! :-D At first I took it to be a prom dress. Your photographer is of a rare and special breed.

What a stunning photo and tribute to friendship!

Great photo! And beautiful story, that's so wonderful that you're so close. I have a girlfriend who sounds incredibly similar, it's a wonderful feeling.

Great friendship- people spend their lives trying to find a friend like that.

what a sweet and stunning narrative and a magnificent photo.. how lucky you are to have both that deep and long term friendship to carry you and the photo as a constant reminder!!

It brings up a lot of longing in me. I have a good support network and several close important friendships, but I've always longed for the kind you talk about here. It looks like, from the photo, that it's easy for the two of you to simply have a lot of fun together.

I had a friend a few years ago who really brought the silly out in me. It was great! And then we had a falling out. :(

I have four close woman friends who have made lifetime commitments to each other..we say we got married (LOL)... the wives

that's great! Becky and I always said we'd retire together eventually :) We have a gang of girlfriends that are getting together this summer (IN OREGON!), I can't wait!

In Oregon!?

Grant's pass! August 4-9!


I lived 45minutes from Grants Pass in 1989-90 on the east fork of the Illinois River in Takilma. One of my committed women friends lives in Ashland, also about 45 minutes from GP....

It will be mighty hot down there in August. You'll be wanting swimming holes.

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