January 30th, 2004



It snowed and snowed and snowed last night, wild whirling white flakes for hours. Already at 10:00 p.m., Anders' previous shoveling efforts were completely undone and recovered with several inches of perfect powder. This morning the damage looks to be about 5-6 inches. Snow is a constant wonder. Every time it's equally amazing. Nothing frozen solid, despite the -11 temperature. Both kids took their sleds to school. Martin's class (and the entire school of classes above him) are going to Krankesjön (or Cranky Lake, as I like to translate it) to iceskate and sled and grill hotdogs this morning. They have the perfect, the ultimate, the quintessential winter day for it. The sun came up at 8:14 a.m. in a blaze of glory, reminding everyone and sundry that it really IS a ball of fire, and everything it touched reflected back in admiration.

Mimi Smartypants unwittedly added to my semi-depression today by reminding me of the Red Lion Pub in Chicago, where many good times were had in my past. And their sausage rolls and chutney were SO good and totally put the lie to the notion that all English food is crap. So very very good. sigh.

I spent about an hour yesterday evening curled in a ball on the bed in my darkened bedroom, wallowing in self-pity about this stupid work move, and it helped. A little bit. I feel like I'm being a huge baby about this, but it FUCKING SUCKS. I discovered years ago that the fastest way out of this sort of depression is to wallow in it until your sense of the ridiculous takes over: long hot candlelit baths with Barry Manilow playing helps a lot, but I don't have any BM and I'm more of a shower kind of girl and it's hard to take a bath in peace when you have kids because they want to get in with you and play with the Finding Nemo squirty fish. So the wallow in the darkened bedroom had to do.

Then I got up and edited a boatload of pictures and dealt with another poetry submission (!) for Mosaic Minds and went to bed and read more of Mrs. Dalloway. I'm enjoying it but I'm pretty sure I'd enjoy it more if I were in a different frame of mind. Virginia Woolf's writing is wonderful, and like one big poem of the most gorgeous language choices, but enough with the 8-mile long sentences already, how many commas are ALLOWED in one sentence, for heaven's sake?! I think it would have been better if I had read her in college. Then again, maybe not. Maybe it's just as well.

cap_killer made me laugh this morning, reminding me of one of our college canoe trips. We used to plan weekends on the Manistee River in Michigan and they were very well-attended canoeing parties that went from Friday afternoon until Sunday morning. The first time I took Anders with me on one, we drove up in his Porsche. The ultimate camping vehicle, no? Anyway, long before that, during one of these canoe debauches, it rained and rained and rained. It rained so hard that the campsite was a sea of mud and we were in danger of washing away. Everything was wet and everyone was miserable, and finally we gave up and packed up the wet tents and wet stuff and wet food and set off in search of a hotel. I think we had several cars in a convoy driving through the downpour, in search of a hotel. They were all full. Every one we stopped at had the same story: sorry, full of campers already. After several of these rejections, Julie wailed, "It's just like the inn and little baby whats-his-name!!" :)

Thank God, it's not just me: Holy Crap, What a Bad Day from One Good Thing

Funny, and sadly, true: A Day in Marketing from Geese Aplenty
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ozswede and my brother sent me lots of good advice about my work dilemma (among other things), for which I'm very grateful, although the urge to squash my brother is still deviling me. :)

Today wasn't nearly as bad, and work was made better by 2 things. First the girl in charge of our seating plan came and let me know she was more than happy to re-seat me wherever I would feel most comfortable. We talked about it for awhile, and ended up deciding that the 4 of us in the department would wait to pin down our names until we've actually moved and can SEE the space.

Later, my boss came in, shut the door, and said, "I need to talk to you," which normally makes me a bit nervous. This time, however, he said that he understood how upset I am about the move, and that he is completely on my side, and that if I feel it's necessary to start looking for a new job, he will do his best to help me in any way. Which he immediately followed up with, "But I hope you WON'T feel that it is necessary because you do a great job, and we need you and it would totally suck if you left." Then he told me he had talked to our department head and if it was okay with me to try the new arrangement for a month, if after that it still was too awful for me to work, they would make arrangements for me to be able to work at home at least 1 day a week. We're not moving until the end of February, so I do at least have more time to get used to the idea.

After work, I met gale_storm and a couple of other AWC women for sushi, which was fantabulous. It was snowing again when I drove into town and all through dinner, although not incredible amounts. It had apparently snowed quite a bit more at home, though, and the neighbors have a big ol' snowman in their backyard. We will have to go out tomorrow and challenge them to a snowman-building contest. :) Tomorrow evening is my sister-in-law's birthday party and we're invited for dinner. She's an excellent cook, so I'm looking forward to that part of the evening (the sitting in front of the TV afterwards is less exciting :)

Check this out, right now: Uncommon Creatures* I really want a Dogish, or perhaps a Flourescorus Extraterrestria, but the Mooscato and some of the others gave me the heebie-jeebies! and ozswede!! You have to look at the Canis Iguanidae! It's like if Lambi and I had puppies! baha!

*thanks for the link inflammatio!
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    BoDeans—Pick Up The Pieces