January 3rd, 2006

bah

NUMBER OF BRAINCELLS REQUIRED

  • to realize it's the alarm going off in the black hole of morning: 1%

  • to realize it's the alarm going off AGAIN and make a flapping motion in the correct direction to make it stop: 1%

  • to stumble up from bed, collect clothing, shower, dress, makeup, transport children to daycare, wave goodbye: 1%

  • to drive to work: 1%

  • to hold conversations, check and respond to urgent emails, finish layout revisions on a 24-page brochure, create 2 HTML invitations, and a product page, send things to print, finalize and distribute 15 email newsletters successfully, move collateral inventory, create technical schematics, help a new colleague with questions, attend meetings, plan upcoming projects, interact with co-workers and new boss: 70%

  • to drive home from work: 1%

  • to stop at the grocery store and remember the urgent items needed at home without benefit of written list: 1%

  • to go for half hour brisk walk through neighborhood, down snail trail, around Flyinge and back again with both kids talking a mile a minute: 6%

  • to make dinner, bathe children, sing songs, make jokes, read bedtime stories, tuck and kiss goodnight: 8%

  • to refrain from eating more than one cookie for dessert: 5%

  • to read half a book in a sort of trance: 5%

  • to write a scintillating, provocative, and interesting journal entry:
    OOPS—None left





(actual number of braincells required to make the math on the above percentages come out right: 142% sigh)