January 17th, 2010



Messy mush of conflicting feelings; the usual state of affairs in my head these days. I don't seem to have any level days, it's up and down, a constant motion. If life were a boat, I'd be hanging over the side, green in the gills, heaving. Last week, the first official week back at work had me with my head down, pounding through a monster list of projects and requests and emails with barely a chance to come up for air. If I hadn't worked during my last week of vacation, I'm positive my head would have exploded by Friday. Even two days off of mostly weekend relaxation and a full last day of downtime with my mom doesn't feel like enough to offset the craziness. I feel older and tireder and in need of more sleep. Maybe I just need iron? A massage, a hug, a nap.

Today, I distracted myself from the dismay of the end of Mom's visit by cooking for my friend Debbie's family; her husband is still going through chemo (round 4 ended 2 days ago): 6 meals are in the freezer and that makes me feel really good.

Even with lots of good things to look forward to, I seem to have rather dimmed vision at the moment. Perhaps it's all just post-PMS and things will brighten up in a day or two. At least I managed to sit down and write something here; been feeling unable to find the ork or anything even semi-meaningful to share. Perhaps tomorrow's long overdue visit to the hairdresser followed by a massage will be just what I need. And maybe it's just the January/February Blues, and the only cure is putting my head down again and slogging toward Spring.

Anyone else feeling like this? What are you doing to counteract it, if so?

Feeding My Hungry Head:
  • Finally got to see UP. I love Pixar. LOVE
  • In the middle of an intriguing, unpredictable, hard-to-put-down book: Her Fearful Symmetry by Audrey Niffenegger
  • Found a new magazine (thanks to Mom) full of excellent articles that I want to subscribe to: Intelligent Life
  • Current Music
    Laura Veirs—Don't Lose Yourself
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