- Things I've Never Done That I'm Proud of: smoked a cigarette, worn beer goggles, driven recklessly
- Things I Wouldn't Do Even If You Paid Me: bungee-jump, eat snails, be unfaithful to my husband
- Things I've Done But Wouldn't Do Again: given birth, lied about something important, approached an unfamiliar dog
- Things I Would Do in a Heartbeat: play Euchre, help a friend in need, hide candy from the children
- Things I Would Do Right Now If I Could Find the Motivation: edit photos, update webpages, exercise
- Things I Might Do If You Paid Me: move, get a tattoo, the Hokey-Pokey
- Things I Do All the Time That I Probably Shouldn't: swear, buy chocolate, drive faster than the speed limit
- Things That Don't Work on Me: tickling my feet, telling me I'll go to hell, reverse psychology
- Things I Used to Think Were Cool: clogs, Rick Springfield, smart-mouthed replies
- Things I've Learned the Hard Way: friendships aren't likely to weather betrayal but the ones that do are SO worth it; that sometimes the choice you make between your man and your cats isn't the one you thought it would be once; white clothing and I just really don't belong together
- Things I Could Think of to Post About That Would Be Even Less Entertaining Than These Lists: rashes, cleaning the bathroom drain, my to-do list
- Things That Will Leave You Wondering and Hoping For More:* the cop said "Do you thinks it's fun to offend the police?"; I knew exactly what would happen when I met her; there's not much dirt on me, that's chocolate, that is.
Very Strange Very Happy Birthday Wishes to somebodystrange!
*but, alas, doomed to disappointment