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I spent a lot of time the last year and a half learning how to say no to the increasing demands on my time and energy. Recently, I have begun to wonder if I need to begin re-learning how to say yes. Or if what I am feeling is just an slippery possessive sense of obligation. Or if it's just another one of my control issues. It it will come down, as I suspect it will, to a choice between an activity I love and an activity I feel strongly about supporting, how will I make a decision that I can live with?
Today is my last day of vacation. Last night I was up until after 3 a.m. because I could not manage, try as I might, to fall asleep. When I am not working I have the slow tendency to turn my bioclock completely upside-down, sleeping in longer and longer, and staying up longer and longer, until gradually I have become a nightbird, singing love songs to the moon and unable to put down whatever book has currently captivated me.* Tomorrow morning's alarm at 7 a.m. will, I am sure, be an abrupt uppercut return to conventional hours. Alas.
Which is worse?
a) the news that a favorite author has died and the knowledge that you have already read all the books he/she ever wrote.
b) the news that one OR MORE of your favorite online authors, whom you
*Right now, it's the The Lymond Chronicles by Dorothy Dunnett.