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PUTTING THE BLAH IN BLAHG
I have a really hard time writing here when I'm feeling down. I want my journal to be a place of positivity and light, not a drudge through dreary blahness, and when I'm not feeling the motivation or the mood, it's really hard for me to kick myself over to the blog and make my fingers do some walking. I know that rainbows don't have to shoot out of my eyeballs or ponies prance by in order for what I am thinking and feeling and writing to be of interest to SOMEONE (Hi Mom!) but I keep thinking that way, regardless.

And it's not that I'm feeling down...exactly. I think what I'm feeling is blah. Like Megsie, who shared similar feelings today, I just want to curl up and read and sleep and have someone else take care of things, and me. I wonder if this feeling is magnified because Anders is out of town for so long and I am feeling the space in our lives where he usually is like a phantom limb. I keep reaching with a missing hand only to be brought up short by its absence. Even telling the kids to call their father when they need help with a math problem isn't enough...I just wish he were home. Even when he drives me mad, my world is seriously lopsided if he's not around.

Both my kids just came in, one after the other, totally without provocation, and gave me hugs. My god, are they PSYCHIC?

Really, what am I whining about? I think they miss him, too. :)

Partly, it's because I feel old lately. That's a whole 'nother post, though.

Partly, it's the weather. Even with the sparkly white snow everywhere, it's pretty blah when the sun isn't also shining. The sky has been high and white for several days and we're supposed to get yet more snow this week. I keep seeing and hearing people talking about spring and wishing it was here, but it's only the beginning of February: Spring will get here when it gets here and its renewal of the world won't be any less miraculous because it comes when it's supposed to, when it usually does: in SPRING.
 blah
mood: blah
music: Pink Martini—Hey Eugene!


Comments
From Megsie

Hello kindred spirit. It is too snowy and slippery to walk right now, how about a movie? Popcorn? Big pillows and warm blankets? Giggling? Sounds SO FUN!!

I know what you mean about having Anders be out of town. Jeff doesn't travel, but when his schedule and mine go the opposite way it feels the same. I hope he gets home soon and realizes how much he has been missed.

Need to go shovel...I have to get to that Brownie Meeting and there is no way I can drive out of my driveway right now.

Love to YOU! xoxoxo

Re: From Megsie

Yes! A movie! Popcorn & blankets and the works. *sigh* Thanks for the kindred spirit comment, it made my day :)

I would totally read the post about feeling old, since I'm feeling it myself.

Also, I put in an order for spring weather in April but I do hope for your sakes that it arrives sooner than that.

I'm aiming for MARCH.

I think it must be a crap time in general. Everyone at work including myself are all tired and not feeling well, yet not sick.

Everyone at my work seems stressed out too, so at least I'm not alone...still: no fun.

Isn't February the perfect time to travel to a sunnier place? I remember this every year, too late to make those sorts of plans. Duh.

I never think about it until it's too late, but a trip to sunnier climes would sure be a good antidote!

(Anonymous)

HAHAHAHA........"Feeling the space in our lives where he usually is like pain in a phantom limb" - this sentence has made me read it several times...does it need a comma so I don't think he is THE PAIN????? :0
Since I sure know that isn't true! Besides, Blah can really just mean missing someone. It happens to me all the time when I (or my Kids- Grandkids)leave. It truly is an emptiness. Love & Hugs, Lizardmom

Haha! You made me go back and edit it, mom. That WASN'T what I meant!

This happens every February for me. thanks goodness it is a short month! Hope you perk up soon:)

I think I need to throw a F*ck February party! :)

"Even when he drives me mad, my world is seriously lopsided if he's not around."
Let's just say, hypothetically, that a certain someone had spent the morning going crazy because of a certain husband of hers... and then read that sentence and remembered that husbands are pretty good things to have around after all. Hypothetically. :)
(Does the F*ck February party include Bailey's and slipper socks? Because if so, I'm there!)

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