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Karin's boyfriend, who was here for dinner last night and behaved in a completely normal manner, broke up with her today.


She's devastated, and I feel as if everything I say sounds unfeeling, condescending and pathetic. Even though it's probably not. I remember (vaguely) what it was like to be 15 and in love, though I didn't have a "real" boyfriend for another few years. Even if he's her third boyfriend and not even the first that has broken up with her, even if she's strong as a rock, even if she's too young, he's too young, they're both too young to be trying this on for size, my baby is still hurting and I'd like to go wring his neck.


What do you say to a child, who is learning how to be a woman, who is learning what it means to learn to like someone, to care for someone, to love someone, about how to handle the hurt of feelings that don't make sense, that aren't fair, that shouldn't have to happen? There isn't anything I can say that will make it better. She's being more stoic than I anticipated, probably because she knows how I feel about drama, and I know she got a lot of her crying out this afternoon after their talk, but still.


It's selfish to hope she won't have another boyfriend until she's (and more importantly, HE'S) ready to actually handle what it means. It's selfish to hope that she'll content herself with girlfriends and focus on her schoolwork instead. It's selfish to think that there is plenty of time for boyfriends LATER, right? Right.

Still. GAH.
mood: sympathetic


Movies (no rom-coms!), board games, popcorn (no ice cream!) haha.

It probably doesn't help a 15-year old to hear that boys don't even grow up until they're 40 or so. But it might help her to realize that what other people choose is not a reflection on us. In other words, she shouldn't take a break-up personally. This was a decision made by someone else based on many things (or, because he's so young, based on mostly nothing, but don't tell HER that!)

Heartbreak is part of learning how to communicate with others, so this is a learning experience in the long run. Just comfort her and distract her and assure her that we have all been there and it helps us to grow. <3

40? Might as well be dead,...that's SO OLD. Ha!

She ate popcorn today after school and texted me about it so I wouldn't get mad (no chips/snacks during the week rule). :D

And I agree with your parenthesis, so true!

July 2019
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lizardek's obiter photos
lizardek's obiter photos

Feeling generous? Be my guest!

I can complain because rose bushes have thorns or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.

Abraham Lincoln

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